SO, here I am. Starting a blog. The idea is to chronicle my efforts to stop drinking and generally become a badass. I just read You are a Badass by Jen Sincero and she (along with my therapist and my yoga teacher) inspired me to go out and buy a brand spanking new Macbook Pro (with retina display even!) and start a freaking blog!But it really all started before that. It really started last week when I went to see this new, functional doctor. What’s a functional doctor, you ask? Don’t worry – everybody does. It’s a board-certified M.D. who is also certified as a functional doctor – meaning they assess my entire life situation when deciding treatments. We spent a solid hour talking about my life, my job, my kids, etc…It was no shocker that my STRESS level is the biggest health risk in my life at the moment. Oh, and that I drink 4-5 cocktails plus 1-2 tequila shots every night. Well, most nights.My new doc was like, “yeah, you gotta stop doing that.” Turns out that having more 2-3 drinks PER WEEK greatly increases a woman’s risk of heart disease and stroke. Not to mention my poor, poor liver and is this really the role I want to model for my kids? Definitely not. So, I left with instructions to cut back a little each week between now and my upcoming yoga retreat to Mexico and, while there in that magical place, make the commitment to stop all together when I get home. (I am glossing over a lot of really awesome things that the new doc said but promise to come back and fill you in at later date).Obviously, this is not going to be an easy process and I know that I will be on one helluvan emotional roller coaster so I thought that it would be incredibly beneficial for me to journal during the process. But then I read You are a Badass and talked to my husband and VOILA – I am starting a blog. I had intended to start on Day 1 but you all know what the road to hell is paved with so here I am, finally showing up, on Day 10. But I’ll give you a quick recap:Day 1 – depressed, felt like I was being punished, split half a bottle of sake with husband.Day 2 – woke up feeling very anxious, felt better after therapy, drank 2 cocktails.Ok, so you get the idea. I was quite successful in not getting hammered up until Day 8, which was Date Night and I had two beers, two martinis, two glasses of red wine and half a cocktail before I feel asleep on the couch. Then on Day 9, last night, I had two cosmos while waiting for take out (although one was really small) and then two ridiculously strong cosmos at home. Unfortunately, my big boys were home last night and they witnessed me passing out on the couch and then puking in the kitchen sink. Neither of which I remember. Judge me all you want. I am a kickass mom who unfortunately has a drinking problem but I am willing and capable of change. It pains beyond belief to even think about what I did much less publish for the world to read but no more shame. I am going to get better. One post at time.