I got drunk last night. I was so proud of myself for staying sober that I got drunk. It’s like there’s a little flame inside of me sometimes and it grows until I drown it in booze. But, also, yesterday was the first day since I got back from Mexico that I was stressed about work and it was like there was nothing left for family stress at the end of the day. And my oldest comes home today!
But – and I know this probably sounds like an alcoholic talking – I am really in a struggle for my soul here. What is the sweet spot for me? I really don’t believe that totally denying myself alcohol is the right answer and I am definitely drinking much less and yet I have a headache today. :(. Back to back yoga is my prescription and I am having a shamanic session this afternoon. I want to be better. I want to be healthy. I am sick of these demons.