Don’t you just love those moments when you hear yourself say something out loud that is EXACTLY the message that you need to hear? I always get the feeling that God is laughing (good naturedly, of course) in those moments. I had a brilliant one a couple weeks ago.My oldest son, Aidan, is in the sixth grade this year and he is typically a very good student and I have little trouble getting him to do his homework. I’ve come to learn over the years that, whenever he is dragging his feet about a particular assignment, it is because he has some fear or uncertainty about it. Often, he’s just not sure how to begin. Sound familiar?Well, on this evening, when I asked whether he had any homework, he immediately got defensive and started ranting about how he had to write a poem but there was no way because he couldn’t do it because he didn’t have any idea what to write about or how to write and there was no way it was ever going to happen because it would never be “good enough.”Of course, poetry is my middle name. Perhaps I’ve never shared this but poetry is probably my TRUE love. Writing, in general, comes easily for me but poetry…it’s almost like breathing.So, when my oldest son told me that he COULD NEVER write a poem because it was too hard and there was just no way that it ever going to be “good enough”…I opened my mouth and said, “It’s just hard because you’re telling yourself it’s hard. All you have to do is sit down and start putting words down.” That was the moment when I knew the Universe was actually speaking to me.I had been frustrated with certain aspects of my coaching business and telling myself that it wasn’t going to work because it was too hard. I stopped believing that I could do it. Because I had started telling myself that it was hard. That it would never be good enough. And it’s all about the story we tell ourselves, isn’t it?I sat down with Aidan and the two of us worked together to write a poem. I didn’t write for him or even put words in his head. The poem was supposed to be about veterans so I asked him questions to provoke thoughts and evoke feelings in him. Questions like “how would you feel if you had to travel to a foreign land and leave you family behind?””I would feel scared,” he replied. “So, put that down.” Aidan looked at me for a moment and then said, “But what if I write how I would feel scared and then the teacher thinks it is good and I have to read it in front of the whole school during the Veteran’s Day assembly.”Then it hit me like a lightening bolt. We all know that Marianne Williamson quote about how we’re not actually afraid that we not any good. We’re actually all afraid of own greatness. I will admit that I have often wondered about this and whether it was true and then BAM. Here it was right in front of me.Aidan wasn’t really worried that he couldn’t write a “good enough” poem. He was afraid to allow himself to write a great one. Because then he’d had have to share his honest feelings with his entire school. And for a 12-year old boy, that’s a pretty tall order.I reckon it is a tall order for a 43-year old woman, too. For most of us. Why are we so afraid to be visible? Why are we so afraid that we’re not “good enough?” Because the TRUTH is that most of are settling for “good enough” when we should be going for full out, rock star awesome.I know that I’m ready now. No more stalling. No more settling for “good enough” when I know in my heart I can do better. This is not about pushing myself too hard or burnout or anything like that. This is about knowing what I’m worth and going for it…in a big, big way.Oh yeah – Aidan wrote his poem that night. And then, once he saw how easy it was, he totally rewrote it and rocked it out at school the next day. I don’t think he’s reading in the assembly…but at least he found his voice. And wasn’t afraid to use it.
