After we’ve been betrayed, we are oftentimes filled with the fear that we cannot trust ourselves.
Because of the discovery that we’ve been blind or unaware of the betrayal, we begin to doubt our ability to make good decisions. That’s why this week I want to share with you Four Ways to Trust Yourself Again.
1. Your Boundaries
You’ve got to set boundaries to keep yourself safe. Our most important boundaries are the ones we have for ourselves. What behaviors are you tolerating from others? Are you making concessions that compromise your values? Honoring our boundaries are how you teach yourself that you are trustworthy.
2. Your Voice
Use your voice. Using your voice is how you set and maintain your boundaries. Most importantly, when you want to say no, say no. I find that we when we yes to something when we really want to say is one ways that betray ourselves. You learn to trust yourself when you honor your own needs and desires rather than gaslighting yourself, or making concessions in your relationships, at work, with your kids, with yourself.
3. Your Intuition
Trust your intuition. We can think of intuition just as listening to our gut because our intuition, our gut (i.e. body) have been really conflated. However, I believe that our intuition is more contextual. It’s your subconscious mind gathering information from the past, present and future, and then helping you make decisions. You have to learn how you specifically receive information from your intuition. Learn how to recognize it and learn to listen to it, and do what it wants you to do to the extent that you can in your life.
4. Your Body
Body is different than intuition, although they can work together. Our intuition creates signals in our body, but there are different pieces of information that we have access to in our bodies. Noticing in a situation whether your body is expanding, softening, and open to receiving, or if it’s contracting, pulling back, or stiffening. We have to begin noticing what’s going on in your body. That’s how you learn to trust yourself again.
So, there you have it. Four ways that you can learn to trust yourself again. These are all practices that we are not taught.
We’re not taught to use boundaries. We are taught to make concessions.
We’re not taught to use our voice. We’re taught to stay quiet and small.
We’re not taught to honor intuition or our bodies. We’re taught to honor logic and our minds. However, these are not more valuable than what your intuition is telling you, or what your body is telling you. So, let’s learn to start honoring all of them.